


Sauron, noted dark lord and ring forger, defeated

by HASA_Archivist



Category: The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Canon - Non-canonical to good purpose, Characters - OOC to good purpose, Humor, Plot - Can't stop reading, War of the Ring, Writing - Good use of humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-01
Updated: 2015-05-01
Packaged: 2018-03-26 13:59:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 490
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3853264
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HASA_Archivist/pseuds/HASA_Archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Humour.  From the obituary page of the Thangorodrim Gazette, 26 March, T.A. 3019.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sauron, noted dark lord and ring forger, defeated

**Author's Note:**

> Note from the HASA Transition Team: This story was originally archived at [HASA](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Henneth_Ann%C3%BBn_Story_Archive), which closed in February 2015. To preserve the archive, we began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in February 2015. We posted announcements about the move, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this author, please contact The HASA Transition Team using the e-mail address on the [HASA collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/hasa/profile).

_Thangorodrim Gazette, 26 March, T.A. 3019_

**Sauron, noted dark lord and ring forger, defeated**

DAGORLAD - Sauron, noted dark lord and ring forger, has passed away. Sauron was overseeing the defeat of the Host of the West when the One Ring was flung into Amon Amarth, destroying him.

"It was terrible," Uruk captain Grishtok remembers. "He was just–gone. I felt empty. Then I looked back, and saw the sky go dark, the blackness blistered by fire; and then the Tower crumbled, and the Iron Gate splintered, and I knew that the might of Mordor had been shattered."

Few of the survivors were so eloquent. Brug the Troll expressed confusion and anger at yesterday’s events. "Arrgghhh. Brug work hard. Not eat supervisor. Now cave fall down, and Brug hungry!" Brug ate two of our cameramen to console himself. Unfortunately he ate their cameras too.

Sauron came to Arda in the Days before Days as a servant to Aulë. But he soon realized that Melkor the Dreadful was the rightful King of Arda, and through hard labour and wickedness rose to become his most powerful and trusted servant. A master of shadows and phantoms, foul in wisdom and cruel in strength, Sauron was instrumental in outwitting that boor Tulkas and returning Melkor to his rightful dominion in Middle-earth.

Although Sauron spent most of his time in Angband, crafting twisted new servants for his master, after Melkor slew that poncy Elf-king Fingolfin he sent Sauron to take over the watchtower on Tol Sirion. The frightful lord of werewolves took Minas Tirith by assault, driving the defenders away under a dark cloud of fear; and anew the isle was named Tol-in-Gaurhoth, the Isle of Werewolves, and became a magnificent stronghold of evil. It was here that he slew the eldest son of Finarfin, who foolishly thought he could win a singing contest against one of Angband’s premier soloists.

The good times, unfortunately, were not to last. Ulkûrz still remembers the day that She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named came to Tol-in-Gaurhoth. "He kept sending them out, my brothers, and they didn’t come back. He killed them all, one by one, even our sire Draugluin. And after that, well, our master just wouldn’t stay put.

"Up he rose, majestic and terrible in his splendour, and cried aloud, ‘I’ll get you my pretty, and your little dog too!’ And then he went out..." Ulkûrz was unfortunately not able to continue his story. He was one of the few survivors of the massacre that day, fleeing with his master into Taur-nu-Fuin, and is still suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder.

The final fall of Melkor the Dreadful was, well, dreadful. But Sauron, master of cunning, crafted a new breed of orcs called "lawyers" and tricked Manwë’s herald into bailing him out on his own recognizance. Disappearing into the depths of Middle-earth, Sauron began to gather the remnants of Melkor’s servants and harness their power to bring about a new dark age.

 

_TBC..._


End file.
